Chapter 2 - One Country, Four Paws
In which Pooh discovers Three Acre Wood and is only temporarily deceived by the Running Dogs of Capitalism

One fine morning in One Hundred Acre Wood, Pooh went to visit Piglet. He was feeling a little peckish, and thought that he and Piglet might be able to rustle up a little something together. He walked over to Piglet's house, and knocked on the door, but there was no reply.

On the door was a message: "HAVGON TO RURAL RE-EDJUKASHUN KAMP."
Being a bear of little brain, Pooh didn't know quite what to make of this, but suspected that Piglet wouldn't be back soon.

"It's a shame that Piglet isn't home", thought Pooh, feeling increasingly hungry. "I wonder whether Owl would like to join me for a little something."

Bravely, Pooh decided to go for a walk by himself, to see if he could find Owl, and see whether Owl wanted to share to share some honey. As he marched through One Hundred Acre Wood, he sang a tune that went something like this.

I'm humming a little hum -- pom, pom!
To stop my rumbling tum -- pom, pom!
From grumbling.

And when elevenses are done -- pom, pom!
The fun will have begun -- pom, pom!
When I make the dogs of capital run...

It wasn't long before Pooh was thoroughly lost.

"Oh dear", thought Pooh, a little scared. "I wonder if I'll be able to find my way home."

As much as he tried, though, Pooh couldn't quite make it to Owl's house. And the more he tried, the more he got thoroughly lost. It was almost as if the trees in One Hundred Acre Wood were willing him to go somewhere else.

Soon, in the distance, Pooh saw a clearing. When he got there, he was greeted by a wide open field and, on the other side, a thicket that he'd never seen before. He scampered across the field in a hungry-bear sort of way, to see what he could see.

As soon as he got into the new wood, he saw that, although it was small, it was brimming with good things. Little bee hives sprouted from every tree, there was lots of shade, and he could even hear a little stream. Pooh was very excited indeed. He followed the sound of water, stopping only briefly to dip his paw into a honey-filled hive or two. When he arrived at its source, he saw a crystal clear pool, and, to his amazement, two Very Strange Animals on top of one another.

"My goodness!" said Pooh.

"Oh dear!" said one of the Very Strange Animals, rolling off the other Very Strange Animal hastily.

"Hallo!" said Pooh.

"Um, hello", said the other Very Strange Animal.

Feeling that the conversational onus was on him, Pooh ventured, "I'm Winnie the Pooh. I'm a bear. What sort of animal are you? And where am I?"

"We're bears too!" said the first Very Strange Animal, his composure a little regained.
"You don't look like bears," said Pooh, knowledgably. "Bears don't have black rings round their eyes or fat black stripes."

"Ah yes," said the second Very Strange Animal. "Well, we're not quite bears like you. We're called Pandas."

"Oh." Said Pooh, certain that something wasn't quite right. And then he had an idea. "If you're bears, why is there so much honey here? Wouldn't you have eaten it all by now if you were bears?"

"Well, we only eat honey as a last resort, if ever we run out of bamboo. But there's so much bamboo here in Three Acre Wood that we don't really need to," said the second Very Strange Animal, her patience clearly wearing thin.

"Three Acre Wood?"

"Yes, this is Three Acre Wood. We came here to escape the noise in One Hundred Acre Wood, you see. It's a little more bijou, but has a great deal of charm."

"Don't you want to come and play with us in One Hundred Acre Wood?" asked Pooh, a little confused. "We've got trees, and hefalumps, and Christopher Robin said that soon we'll go on a Long March."

"That's very nice, isn't it dear?" said the first Panda.

"Yes, indeed. Listen, Mr Pooh, why don't we all get some practice in before the Proper Long March? If we're going to come with you, we'll need to get into shape. Our paws are a little soft from the easy living we've got here."

"That's a good idea," said Pooh, a little sad that he hadn't thought if it first.

"Yes, it is," said the second Panda. "We'll just need a moment to finish up here, but if you can blaze a trail for us back to One Hundred Acre Wood, as fast as you can, we'll be able to follow easily."

"Okay then," said Pooh. "Here I go!" And Pooh ran as fast as he could, bursting with excitement at being able to tell everyone about Three Acre Wood, and his new friends there. He headed out of the thicket, through the meadow, and straight back to his house. But the Pandas never came.

And so it was that Pooh came to understand that the population of Three Acre Wood were lackeys of the ruling class, and traitors of the People. He vowed that Three Acre Wood would one day be reunited with One Hundred Acre Wood, that its abundant resources would be put to confraternal use, and that its treacherous inhabitants would be made to understand the failings of bourgeois virtue and the true Way of the People.

Chapter 3: Paper Tigers and People's Kangaroos